The Daily Mail, oh, the Daily Mail. I wish you’d die. But seeing as you haven’t, and you published this, well, here’s an annotation:

Despite complaining that it looks unkempt and feels rough to touch, the unshaven look on a man is actually a turn-on for 41 per cent of women.

That’s what we call, a minority. The ones that want to find a man whose face feels like theirs, perhaps?

A slightly geeky personality came second, proving that women really do like a guy who knows their stuff when it comes to technology.

Yeah, you know why? Because jocks are dicks. Don’t believe me? Check out every film with jocks in ever. Is this alone going to get a single geek laid? Definitely not.

A hairy chest was voted third, followed by a man who loves to read or cries at a soppy film.

Man up, Daily Mail readers’ husbands, man up. When you don’t, you look like this: Crying Wife (that’s right, a crying girl who at least has the self-respect to be embarrassed because she looks silly. And she’s a girl!)

But almost one in five would never admit what they really find attractive in a man to other people.

Almost one in five! Holy crap, that means a meagre over-eighty-percent of women have at least one peer group that they feel comfortable in! The bitches! Pretty unusual for a statistical minority to have an unusual attitude, isn’t it? Oh no, that’s what unusual means. Daily Mail, you dicks.

It seems women really do like a guy who is able to show a softer side, or who is carrying a little bit of extra weight.

So that they don’t feel fat. Or end up sleeping with the garden rake. And, right, did everybody think that girls only hang around with men who never listen to them? Anybody who has got laid at some point and isn’t a regular topic of Daily Mail headlines will disagree.

And more than half would rather a guy who was soft and cuddly instead of toned and muscly.

What was that other thing you said about British Women, Daily Mail? “they are overweight, unkempt and lazy about grooming“. At least this profile of women that you’re building knows its league, eh.

Women also prefer a guy who doesn’t spend too much time on his appearance, with 63 per cent saying they would like a man who got ready quickly rather than fussing over what he looked like.

Because then he’d be gay, or a guido. Using first-order Daily Mail logic, can we say that 37% of British women would tolerate a guido or a gay boyfriend? Of course we can!

Fifty-eight per cent of women even want a guy who doesn’t care what he eats over someone who is watching his weight and counting calories.

See above; also,


That is all.